Las Vegas 2019

Lightning Talk: Saying "No" Doesn't Make You an Arse

7 Ways to Exercise Your "No" Muscle


Lightning Talk

DD

Dominica DeGrandis

Principal Flow Advisor, Tasktop

Transcript

00:00:02

All right, everybody. We're going to have a Frank talk about the no word. We're going to have a discussion on it, actually, because when we spend a lot of time saying, yes, we overload ourselves, we overload our teams, we overload the family, the dog, you name it. And we don't get the things that are really important to do. But it's hard to say no. So my husband got me this hat and I thought, oh nice. And then I wondered, did he get me this so that he could borrow it? When I asked him to make these long lists of things to do. And it's hard for him to say no, right? It's uncomfortable for us to say, no, we're not used to saying it, but say no does not make you an ours. Right. Sometimes it's needed. So we're going to practice seven ways to get your know skills on number seven, your colleague asks you to, for help to fix the printer, your response, you could say, you know, I'm really busy right now. There are some instructions for the printer. See if you can figure that out, you know, be aware of allowing yourself to be pegged as the fixer person, right? And don't assume that what your colleagues are doing is more important than what you're doing. Number six, uh, Brett resigns, and the boss asks you to cover his workload just until the new hire starts. Your response.

00:01:29

You could say, I am so honored that you would consider me for this position. I'm going to have to get back to you. Uh, after I talk with the team, you know, sometimes you just have to stall to the least responsible moment. Alright? Number five, boss, man has asked you to work on project, Sally, your response. It's hard to say no to the boss, particularly when they make you an offer, you cannot refuse it, but it, you know, it could be eat, be careful with this because you may not want to be involved with project Sally. Maybe it's just not in your cards. Right? You may need to think about it so you can head, you know, if you had to know, you can buy some time. Number four, do you have a minute? Your response?

00:02:23

Yeah. Sorry, mate. You know, nothing really ever takes just a minute. Uh, and if you can remember your mornings, the first thing in the day is to get your most important work done, right? If you continue to say less, yes. And let people interrupt you your whole day could be shot with, you know, five minute interruptions, number three, your colleague notices that you're headed out to lunch and asks you if you could pick them up some aspirin and some black socks, your response. Yeah. Yeah, no. Sorry. No. In some cases is just best not to elaborate. Right? I mean, keep in mind that no is actually a complete sentence.

00:03:14

You just need to do that. Okay. Number two, uh, your friend from out of town has a ride for the week. They think you have all week to spend with them, right? Your respondents. Yeah. It's like, oh, I am so excited to see you, but I'm just impossibly busy this week. Remember we can have many high priorities, but we can only have one top priority. And if we decide to say yes to something else, we're going to delay our top high priority. Number one, can you do a favor for me? Can you cover the Atlanta meeting your response?

00:03:56

Yeah. With this one, consider the trade-offs because it could be that, you know, maybe if you cover the Atlanta meeting, then you can ask them to cover your Cleveland meeting for you. Remember that WIP work in progress is a leading indicator, right? The single most important factor that affects wait time is capacity utilization. So how the think, just consider Warren's message here, right? Because your response of no, anybody asking you to do something, if it's not in line with your goals, then no is an honorable response. Um, because if you're going to get the work of your life done, then you need to allocate time to do so. Right. You have to ruthlessly protect your time so that you can liberate yourself. So what are you going to say no to today? Thank you.